Being home sucks. Having your life planned for two years is amazing. Not knowing what your life has in store for you in the next two years, not so amazing. Things seem to be going so well. I was down to ONE episode every three months. That's super amazing progress for me. It hasn't been that good...since it started. So that's a LONG time. And now it's hard to feel like I've made much progress, b/c I have apparently not made enough. I thought it was enough; I thought it was more than enough. But life had other plans for me. And as much as it sucks, I really just have to accept it and move on. "Come what may, and love it!" Never has such council had such an impact on me. What a marvelous six words, simple as they may be. I keep repeating that to myself every single day...multiple times each day.
So what to do now? What does life have in store for me next? What is the title to the next Chapter in my life? Or am I still in the mission chapter? I really don't know. Sadly, I have to admit that I intially thought of just ending the book all together. Mostly, b/c I just wanted to be out of this world, not have to deal w/ life. But then a wise friend told me that there are many other ways than death to rise above the world, to escape it long enough to make sense of something. Then you just have to take it one day at a time and see what happens. Again, Come what May...what else can we really do about things? Worrying and get all anxious doesn't fix anything. Been there, done that. That's not to say I won't do it, b/c hey, I will. That's life. I'm not perfect in that respect. I'm still working on it. But I think I've made progress. I'm sure I have. Perhaps this is a chapter entitled "Patience." I've never been much good w/ patience. But I'm quickly learning how it truly is a virtue, how it truly is something that we all need in our lives. Again, patience is another life long pursuit that we're all in search of, or should be. Though it def. takes a back seat to most other things in life; as long as life is going as planned. Haha, it's in the drivers seat when your plan doesn't work out. Live and learn, right? Is there really anything else to do? If so, I haven't figured it out.
On another note, I've watched SOOO much TV recently. It's quite ridiculous. Though I am caught up on most things after a week. Haha. At least I keep myself busy...or asleep. I LOVE sleep. I get lots of sleep recently. :) It's rather wonderful. Oh, and we have SNOW! Like enough snow to call it snow! I'm way excited. Sadly, I don't have any clothes good enough to go play in it! All of my snow clothes are in Utah!!! LAME. Maybe I'll just rough it out w/ what I have. Hmmm...only if it's good packing snow. Then I have to make a snowman and nothing is stopping me from doing so. Except perhaps frostbite. I don't want to get that. So it would probably stop me. But other than that, snow man time is about to befall Little Oaks! Mwhahahaha.
Peace out.
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